A New Career Dream: From Medicine to Education
I did not decide to pursue a career in teaching until the summer after my junior year of college. Until then, I’d had my heart set on becoming a doctor. In high school, I volunteered in nursing homes and hospitals. In college, I became a certified EMT because I loved helping people, and I believed a career in medicine was the most effective way to integrate that love into my work.
I worked as an EMT for three academic years and three summers in college. I loved the camaraderie of being on a squad, interacting with patients—even if just for a little while before they went to the hospital, and the idea that I was pursuing my long-term career goals every time I put on my uniform. I did not, however, love the medicine. The thrill I felt watching doctors in the hospitals I volunteered in, or the tv shows I watched, rush off to help dying patients was not there. Instead, I felt fear, stress, and anxiety.
Each September, my friends on the EMT squad would come back to school after a summer of working on an ambulance in their hometown and regale us with stories of their most gruesome and intense calls. They described initially feeling nervous, but then getting a surge of energy from their ability to assess the situation in front of them and use their skills to deliver care. They enjoyed the high stakes. It made them better caregivers.
Listening to their stories, I knew I felt differently. I knew I would never feel okay with someone’s life in my hands. I’d only ever been on a few calls that could accurately be described as “emergency.” I hated seeing people at their most vulnerable. When I looked at these patients who relied on me to deliver care and make them feel safe in the back of an ambulance speeding towards a hospital they might never leave, I didn’t feel a thrill. I didn’t see a medical puzzle waiting for me to solve. I didn’t see someone I could help at all. I felt sad and lost. Medicine was supposed to be my way to help people for a living, and yet I had never felt more helpless.
“Realizing the dream you’ve held on to for 10+ years isn’t really your dream is a slow and painful process. ”
Realizing the dream you’ve held on to for 10+ years isn’t really your dream is a slow and painful process. I believe I knew medicine wasn’t for me during my first serious call the summer after my freshman year of college. It took me nearly two years to admit that to myself, and another year to accept it. After officially declaring I was no longer pre-med, I felt like I was starting from scratch. What would I do now? I spent a lot of time paying close attention to my daily habits, behaviors in class, and reflecting on my happiest memories because I truly felt like I didn’t know myself well enough. I needed to figure out what I enjoyed enough to build a career from it.
After some introspective work, I realized I loved to learn. I thoroughly enjoyed my classes and decided if I could, I would make a career out of being a student. I considered getting a PhD, and I still might. For now, though, I’ve channeled that love into a career in teaching. I work at a boarding school in Massachusetts that reminds me a lot of the one I attended (and loved) when I was a teenager. I teach history and world religion and have had the most amazing time using the skills and knowledge I got from college and sharing them with my students. I also live on a dorm and coach three sports, so I get to interact with students outside of the classroom. In addition to helping them become better learners, I help them create a home for themselves on campus. I’ve only had this job for about a month, but so far, I feel like I’m learning the skills to help my students every day, in whatever way they need.
